Lord Jesus, I’m thirty years old today.

I always thought that the big 3-0 would be terrifying for me but honestly I am so excited to be entering a new decade!

My twenties were a whirlwind, honey! I lost a lot, learned even more, and recovered it all (and then some!). The last decade was dedicated to healing past trauma, overcoming destructive thought patterns, learning who I am and what’s important to me, cultivating healthy relationships, and building a rock-solid foundation.

Now it’s time to build.

Over the past year, I came to the realization that I’ve had all these dreams and aspirations but haven’t made nearly as much progress as I’ve wanted to. Sure, there were plenty of reasons for this that were outside of my control; but if I have to be honest – and I want to be – much of what had been hindering me was my own self. I had all of the vision in the world of where I wanted to be but navigating the twists and turns of the past few years had me in a funk. I wasn’t throwing myself at my goals. I was merely getting through each day. Survival mode 24/7.

I want this next decade to be different. Gone are the days where I dream about what will happen. Don’t misunderstand me, I’m still dreaming but now it’s time to also show up.

I have to show up for myself.

God created me with the intention to fulfill a specific purpose and I don’t want to leave this earth leaving anything undone. I know I can’t be the only one who is full of vision but for whatever reason has seen little execution. If you’re reading this and you know in your heart that you can do better by you, I want to encourage you to show up for yourself too!

What does it mean to show up for yourself?

Showing up for yourself simply means to do right by you. Showing up for yourself means you do your part to meet your destiny. It means being able to rely on yourself. It is being faithful and true to yourself and your values. Showing up for yourself means you set yourself up to succeed.

How I plan to show up for myself.

There are four main areas I’ve decided to focus on showing up for myself in more: in my health, my finances, my purpose, and self-care. As you read through each one, my hope is that they will help you discover ways that you can show up for yourself as well.

My health

I’m not going to lie; I have seen healthier days. In my twenties, I picked up some really bad health habits. I was a pre-med Spanish major at the University of Florida while working a part-time job and volunteering aggressively at church. I learned to survive off of little to no sleep, coffee, and fast food. I was able to get away with this relatively unscathed back then, but the past year has shown me that my body must be prioritized and treated with care. With this in mind, I’m showing up for my physical health by:

• Eating more well-balanced meals that give me energy and actual nutrients
• Going to bed early enough to get a full night’s sleep so I wake up with the energy to meet the demands of my day
• Drinking more water so I’m not operating from a constant state of dehydration (which leads to a HOST of physical AND mental issues)
• Working out as often as I can to remain strong and fit

My Finances

2018 and 2019 were the worst financial years of my life. The story is too long to tell here, but the short version is my husband and I were evicted from our apartment in October 2018 and spent the next year and 3 months bouncing from one guest bedroom to the next – with our baby in tow – while we tried to get back on our feet. In January of this year, we finally got back on track financially and into our own place.

Since then the Lord has steadily increased our finances. It’s nothing short of a miracle how much God has moved on our behalf. Even during the pandemic when people are being laid off, we have continued to grow financially. Our household income has more than doubled and we now make more than we did before we lost everything. I’m not saying this to brag on us. I just want to encourage you that if you do your part and stay faithful to God, He will take care of you and recover what you lost.

So our finances are doing great but I feel like I can still do better. There’s still debt to be paid (hello student loans and car note) and we also have business moves we’re trying to make that we need to invest in. With this in mind, I’m showing up for myself financially by:

• Living on a written budget
• Paying myself first (AKA saving money)
• Paying off debt

These are simple and self-explanatory but so important! To me, having a written budget is the foundation of strong financial health. Financial coach Dave Ramsey says, “If you don’t tell your money where to go, you’ll wonder where it went.” I’m good about creating a budget but sticking to it, that’s a little more difficult. I’m determined to finally get it right in this decade.

Saving and paying off debt are the highest financial priorities in my household right now. Saving is important because life is unpredictable. Living from one paycheck to the next is DANGEROUS, and I know from personal (homeless) experience! I will never be caught slipping like that again. I am paying myself first this year. This means before any money goes to anyone else – except tithing – I’m sliding a good chunk into my savings account.

Paying off debt is right behind savings in importance for me. The Bible says that the borrower is a slave to the lender. Yikes! I don’t know about you, but I’m not trying to be enslaved to anyone except Christ Jesus. Debt is bondage. I don’t like bondage. I’m showing up for myself by getting out of debt as soon as possible.

My purpose

I’ve been saying for years that I want to be a published author and a successful blogger. But I never truly showed up for it. This decade I am putting intentional effort into my craft. That’s actually why you’re reading this on a brand-new website with a more professional domain name. If this is what God called me to do, I had better be showing up for it consistently and with excellence. Here are the practical ways I’m showing up for my purpose:

• Taking courses in my field and applying what I know in order to become better and more efficient
• Sacrificing fun for the vision (ex: I wanted to go shopping and on a big trip for this birthday. Instead I invested in a course for bloggers and paid for a new website to be designed).
• Intentionally taking the time to write out, review, and take action on my goals instead of ignoring them until Jan 1^st of next year

Self-Care

This is a big one. With all of the drama that I experienced in my finances, marriage, and housing situation alongside the everyday demands of being a working mom to a toddler, self-care was the last thing on my mind for a long time. I was too focused on surviving and putting out fires. The result was a worn-out, tired, irritable woman with no sense of self.

Self-care is not just a hashtag or a trend. We must tend to our mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. Empty cups can’t pour into others. With that in mind, I’m showing up for myself by:

• Prioritizing rest
• Taking free time for myself
• Disconnecting from social media more often

I think I am most excited about these three. I’ve found that I am always on go these days. There seems to always be something I could or should be doing. Constantly being on “go mode” isn’t good for me – or anyone for that matter. I need to prioritize resting.

When I say resting I don’t mean just sleeping. I mean I need to find time to just “be”. There has to be time where my mind is at rest, where I’m not writing, or brainstorming new blog ideas, or checking our accounts to make sure we’re still on track with the savings goals, or catching up with the latest on Instagram, or fixing my toddler lunch. I need time to just relax and enjoy not having to exert myself mentally or physically. I need time to be refreshed!

I know it may seem like that is A LOT of change to try to make but I certainly don’t plan to try to do it all at once or even all overnight. Thankfully, I had already started implementing much of this before today. It’s been a gradual process of change – which is the only way change is sustainable for me personally. Each person is different though. What or how you decide to show up for yourself is entirely up to you. As long as it pushes you closer to God and the call He has placed on your life, that’s all that matters.

Thankfully you don’t have to do it alone. God has promised to help you do your part in reaching destiny, but you at least have to get started. The good news is, you don’t have to wait until you reach a milestone birthday to do it. You can start showing up for yourself right now.

I challenge you to do it. Find at least one way you can start showing up for yourself, ask God to help you, then do it! Once you’ve got that one down, find another area to work on, and wash, rinse, repeat. I have a feeling you’ll look up ten years from now and be amazed at what you were able to accomplish!